Weeding Poison Ivy
by Poop Benedict
Summary: As the next chosen Avatar of the Green, Poison Ivy is finally going to be true defender of all plant life on Earth. But she isn't ready yet to succeed the likes of Alec Holland. Forced to change her ways, Pamela must try her hardest to be the best version of herself to inherit the role.


**A/N:** Hiyah buddies. Been while since I last wrote anything but I just back into comics recently and I fell in _love_ with Poison Ivy. So I thought I'd write a story for her. I have big plans for it but it probably won't amount to much, my work ethic is terrible. But it'll certainly help if ya'll gimme feedback!

Standard Disclaimers apply.

* * *

"I wish you'd stop pouting, Pamela. It is unbecoming of a woman who purports to be the embodiment of Gaia's wrath to behave like a child," Alec grumbled in his otherworldly voice and Ivy had to admit, it was pretty funny to see a hulking green plant monster chastise her for misbehaving. Like Batman during his more talkative moods. "Perhaps I would, if you didn't insist on dragging me out here to meet the Parliament of Trees like a disappointed older brother dragging his delinquent sister to see their parents. And you know what brothers like that, who take their parent's side over their sister's, are called, Alec? _Jerks._ "

The Swamp Thing that assumed the identity of the late Alec Holland sighed in exasperation but smiled inwardly. Before his death and subsequent rebirth, Alec never had any siblings of his own but he remembered always begging his parents for a little brother or sister. Of course that never came to be but he likes to imagine that this is exactly what it was like. A grumpy little green sister that occasionally murdered the odd dozen or so men when she felt a little moody. On second thought, there might have been less manslaughter. Just marginally.

"I am not taking anyone's _side_ , Pamela. I am only doing what I've always done as the Avatar of the Green. Doing as the Parliament of the Trees asks of me. And they've asked me to bring you to them," He rumbled. "You must be mostly tree under all that vegetation, Alec. Cause you're a total stiff," Ivy rolled her eyes at the lumbering mass of green and shrugged. "But fine. Let's go see what Mom and Dad has to say."

Of course, Ivy wasn't really going anywhere. Not in the physical sense. Her body was still back in Gotham, deep in the forest of Robinson Park with her children, both human and plant, all of them in bed right now if she taught them well. But her consciousness was being led by Alec through the green towards its center that housed the lush paradise of flora that in turn housed the ancient Elementals that protected all plant life. The Parliament of Trees.

Pam herself had never personally met them, having an ingrained rebellious streak against any figure of authority, green or not. But she had respected them and their work enough to not actively disrupt them and it seemed enough to the Parliament that Ivy wreaked havoc against humanity as long it was for the sake of the Green, even if she tended to harvest most of the profit for herself. But now that mutual agreement of ignorance was at an end and the Parliament had requested her presence.

Back in Gotham, a city that thrived on fear, Ivy was proud to be one of the few that commanded fear instead of falling victim to it. She didn't attempt to understand it like Crane tried and failed to do. Even Batman, who wielded fear like his weapon was afraid, Ivy has seen it in his eyes. She was above it. She knew of only one other person in Gotham like that and she hated that clown filth.

But this wasn't Gotham. It was the Green and Ivy was to meet the only beings in existence that she couldn't deny were above her. She could admit to being a little nervous.

Alec noticed the unusual rigidness in the woman's smaller frame and he couldn't help but rest a comforting on her shoulder. Of course his size meant he practically covered her entire side. "I was never disappointed in you either, Pamela. Your methods leave much to be desired but I am one with the Green and I can tell better than anyone else just how endless your love for us is."

"…"Pamela didn't reply but Alec couldn't help but smile at the obvious blush dusting her cheeks. He was an Elemental of the Green, defender against the Rot and has seen and done countless feats but making Poison Ivy blush was definitely in his top ten. Abby was going to love hearing about this.

* * *

Pamela thought she knew what to expect from the Elementals. She'd thought Alec drew the short end of the stick when he was turned into one, looking like something straight out of a niche horror comic from the seventies. She has never been more wrong. The literal dinosaur was the _least_ weird thing in the vicinity.

"Pamela Lillian Isley," They began. Not really speaking but projecting straight into her head. It would be a weird experience were it not for the fact that it was just a louder version of how she listened to plants. At the full name, Pamela glanced knowingly at Alec and mumbled, " _Busteeed…_ " Drawing a slight chuckle out of him.

"We have important matters to discuss. Some of which pertains to your juvenile behavior." Only beings as old as they could describe Ivy's crimes as juvenile. "First. You should know that Alec Holland will soon step down from his role as our Avatar." Pamela's head snaps towards Alec beside her but he stared adamantly ahead, avoiding her glare. She had _not_ heard of this. "His duty to his wife beckons him and while we would not usually consider such an excuse, Abigail's potential as the Avatar of the Rot means it is in our best interests if she is monitored at all times."

They were droning on but Pamela's mind was running a mile a minute. She already deduced everything they wanted to say but she couldn't or wouldn't comprehend it. This was crazy. Insanity. This was insanity and Ivy knew insanity. She was dating _Harley_.

"In his place, we have chosen Garfield Logan. He is greener than you." Ivy completely blanked then. "What? Really?" The Green collectively snorted. "No, _idiot_. _You're_ the next Avatar. Obviously." Though they weren't physically laughing, Ivy could _feel_ them sniggering but she was just too shocked to respond.

When the laughter died down, the Green continued. "We apologize for that. We don't really get to talk to anybody besides Alec, who's hard to hate, and while the Green loves you, honestly, the parliament doesn't like you very much." Ivy was flashing back to high school when a certain teacher of hers constantly picked on her with dumb jokes just like this. She wonder if he knows that he might've had a lot do with why she killed people in positions of power.

"But obviously you need a lot of work. A _lot_ of work before you become a suitable replacement for Alec-" That was when she finally had enough. "Who the hell said I even _want_ to replace Alec? I'm not going to be your little lapdog! I'm Poison Ivy! I'm NOT going to just roll over take whatever BS you're peddling." She yells at them but obviously they barely acknowledged her.

"Yes. Quite a lot of work indeed. We'll begin with reforming. Stop committing crimes in the name of the Green. You're only tarnishing it," They ordered and when she tried to speak they continued. "And if you do not comply, we will cut your connection to the Green entirely. You are dismissed until you have completed our first request."

And suddenly, she was thrown back into her own body, forcefully enough to jostle her. _Goddamn Parliament of Jerks._ Beside her, Harley mumbled at her. "Welcome back, Red. How'd the interview go?" Ivy adjusted so she could properly spoon the blonde and grumbled into her neck. "I got the job."

* * *

 **A/N:** To be honest I wanted a more serious tone than what I ended up with but just goes to show I'm just a one trick pony that isn't very good at that one trick.

So yeah it's got HarlIvy but it won't be the focus. That bit right there? That's the right amount I want. This is a Poison Ivy Story. There's plenty of amazing HarlIvy stuff for you read instead if you want. Like Mad Love: A New Beginning by AmberZ10 from which I'm gonna steal a bit of the character histories. Hope they don't mind.


End file.
